These are just some of the things I believe are required to find, create and sustain mature, healthy intimate relationships:

• Heal from past traumas

• Practice forgiveness of self and of hurts inflicted upon you

• Create a safe space for open and honest communication

• Know your triggers

• Set and respect clear boundaries

• Set relationship expectations and intentions

• Have a shared value system (total opposites may attract but may not be able to be sustained)

• Be willing to be vulnerable

• Continue your personal development work

• Practice self-care

• Practice active and compassionate listening

• Understand that what people say, do, think and feel has nothing to do with you and everything to do with them

• Practice unconditional love

• Practice self-acceptance

• Be humble (accept that you don’t know everything and that inherent in relationships is learning and growth)

• Have a support system outside of the relationship

• Honor your emotions

• Commit to empowering your partner to be self-expressed

• Be willing to understand and appreciate your partner’s perspectives, ideas, and opinions

• Periodic evaluation of the relationship to ensure you both still both want the same things

• Separate consciously and lovingly when you are no longer able or willing to fulfill the others’ needs

Identify the problem areas in your relationship and help sustain healthy intimate relationships with 21 Relationship Strengthening Tips.

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